Photo a Day: J.J. Abrams is the Antichrist

Against my better judgement, I went to see the second installment of the Star Trek reboot the other day. I could go on at length about all the things that are wrong with this movie — as a stand alone example of cinema and as part of the Star Trek pantheon.

Rather than do that, in lieu of a real photo for my Photo a Day project, I’ll offer this image that I recently spied on the Internet, obviously created by someone who feels the same way I (and presumably many others) do, vis-à-vis: Star Trek, Into Darkness and its director, J. J. Abrams.

May the spirit of Gene Roddenberry hound you mercilessly until the end of your days, J.J. Abrams

You Fail at Being a Nerd

COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo. — Colorado Springs police are looking for a man who hit two 7-Eleven convenience stores early Wednesday, armed with a Klingon sword.

Et tu, Brute? Or should I say Worf? You sir, have broken the unspoken covenant. But then, you sir, obviously never truly belonged.

In fact, the more I think about it, you probably are not one of us at all, and never aspired to be, but rather someone wishing to throw the authorities off your scent by posing as one of us. When they come for you they’ll take one look and say, “Ah, we obviously have the wrong man. This guy is way too cool to have ever watched [tag]Star Trek[/tag].” Indeed, surely you are too cool to have ever written an airline reservations program for mAd HaKKeR aiRLiNeS in Turbo [tag]Pascal[/tag] for Advanced Placement Computer Science class; too cool to have ever been to a con. Too cool to maintain his own blog on his own site with its own URL. Too cool to know that URL stands for “uniform resource locator.” Too cool to know who [tag]Gary Gygax[/tag] was. Too cool to be writing an entry on said blog when you should be looking for a job. Too cool to have an opinion on Kirk vs. Picard, much less Sisko, Janeway or Archer.

Or so that is your logic. And it may work; who knows. But no, you, sir, are clearly not one of us. And karma will come back around; one way or another you will be punished for your crime. Some day, even if the authorities never find you, you will have to call tech support (because you are not one of us). And the voice on the phone may be tinged with the back streets Mumbai; it may have the air of curry about it. But rest assured, that voice will belong to someone who is undoubtedly one of us; we embrace all creeds, faiths, and races. And your fate and future will hang on this person’s words and deeds. And though you may not realize it, though that person on the other end of the phone on the other side of the world may not realize that he or she is the instrument, we, the [tag]nerds[/tag], will have our revenge.

And rest assured, it will be served cold, a la the [tag]Klingon[/tag] proverb.

P.S. Kirk would WTF PWN Picard. The others, I think they could give him a run for his money, but I’d lay odds on my man Jim. I gotta give even odds to a Captain Hernandez/Kirk throwdown though. She gave the Klingons what-for, in spite of being out-gunned, after all. She should have had more of a role in the show Enterprise, certainly more than three episodes. But then competent bad-ass women make me hot, ‘specially when they wear bangs.

Racy Li Ninja’ed My Tiptree Post

At least she didn’t ninja my epic helm that drops in Scholomance. LOL, actually I haven’t played WoW in months.

Racy Li's NinjaBut anyway, my earlier entry on a recent Alice B. Sheldon – James Tiptree, Jr. biography made the Seventh Blog Carnival of Feminist Science Fiction and Fantasy Fans. Sweet! Seriously, I’m jazzed about this. I wasn’t really expecting anyone besides friends and family to be paying attention to this blog so early on, so *any* outside attention is cool – to be grouped here with other fine company just adds sweet icing to the cake.

Not only is this author’s blog interesting, but so is her site – but frankly, I don’t think ninjas would be that bulky as portrayed in the art for her forthcoming book. Lats that big would only slow a ninja down, I should think. Aren’t they more about wiry, fast-twitch muscle fibers, than bulky, look-good-walking-down-the-street-in-the-Castro, slow-twitch fibers? But on second thought, if the gym-rat look turns you on, well, a girl can dream, I suppose. Why not?

Seriously, her site is cool, and free e-books rule. Ever so much more so when they involve “kickass ninja smut.” I’m going to have to look into that, come to think of it. …

But I digress (as I am wont to do). I should just abbreviate that sentence from now on. BID(AIAWTD).

Anyway, the links in the Seventh Blog Carnival feature some interesting stuff. I was particularly taken with this entry from another author’s blog. In a post that discusses sexism and harassment at cons (once again I’m learning just how ignorant I am with regard to thinking that most sci-fi geeks would just naturally be above that sort of thing), Pamela Taylor discusses how wearing a hajib can be an expression of feminist ideals – and is for her. And don’t misunderstand, she’s not an apologist, by any means; she makes a valid, rational argument as to why a feminist woman would want to wear a hajib, and at the same time calls out the sexism found in both the worlds of science fiction, its fans and Islam. As she concludes:

These two communities — one that would claim to uphold the purest values, and the other which would claim to uphold the most modern — make strange bedfellows indeed, and the fact that they are both falling down with regards to women and harassment points to the need for more work to be done across the board.

… And Then There is the Sexism in Star Trek

The effing hot women of Star Trek in short skirts and body hugging outfits.She calls bullshit on the original Star Trek as well, which, while arguably ahead of its time in terms of the roles of women and minorities (first interracial kiss on TV!), is still undeniably sexist by today’s standards (I know, I was up until the wee hours this past Sunday morning watching a Star Trek marathon on cable). I always found it wonderfully ironic that on the Star Trek franchise with the woman ship captain, Star Trek: Voyager, we still had a super-hot babe running around in skin-tight outfits. While I readily admit to happily ogling Jeri Ryan, I also readily admit, it wasn’t the most, um, progressive aspect of the show.

Ditto for Jolene Blalock on Star Trek: Enterprise. Let’s face it: her outfit was not exactly logical, unless she was trying to distract a slow-witted, emotional human male like myself. I argued with a girlfriend once, who was defending 7 of 9’s and T’Pol’s skimpy outfits by saying that as a Borg (former Borg? Borg, retired?) or a Vulcan, they weren’t subject to human cultural hang-ups, and that unless it were a matter of physical comfort or protection, likely wouldn’t bother wearing any clothes at all.

I, of course, would have been in favor of this; had I been Voyager’s captain, there would have been standing orders to keep the bridge thermostat at about 35 degrees C (that’s about 95 degrees F for you Luddites out there). But that argument doesn’t stand up for our lovely Vulcan first officer. My non-nerd girlfriend wasn’t aware (as you no doubt are, if you are still reading at this point) that Vulcans come from a hot, dry desert planet, one that is very hot by human standards. So, ostensibly, the interior of the Enterprise, set for human comfort, would feel cold and clammy to T’Pol, who logically would more likely be wearing an anorak than her usual attire, which was about one polyester molecule thick. Nevertheless, having acknowledged this inherent Trek sexism (Trekism?), she sure was very pleasant to look at. And that short hair … oh my. That would be another standing order.

This reminds me: I still can’t think about Jeri Ryan without remembering how it came out in the divorce proceedings between her and now-former U.S. Congressman Jack Ryan that he frequently tried to drag her to sex clubs and cajole her into having sex with him in front of strangers, or having sex with strangers in front of him, or some such freakishness. Can’t help but think: “um dude? Jack, ole buddy … WTF? I’ve been accused of being pretty kinky myself, but damn, dude, you were married to Jeri Ryan. You snuggled up next to 7 of 9 when you turned out the lights at night. Jeez, wasn’t that enough for ya? You just had to get greedy, huh? Idiot.”

Wow, we are pigs; a pretty sorry lot on the whole I guess :p I always assumed that science fiction, cons and so forth would be bastions of feminism; at least a safe harbor of open-minded individuals. I guess not.

And speaking of supposedly feminist shows that actually are not so much, I’m off to watch a rerun of the L-Word before bed … oh, Shane … hurt me.