Fave Spam: Fastidious Post Edition

The Anal Retentive Chef of Blogging

Phil Hartmann as the Anal Retentive Chef? Or Jeff Chappell writing a blog post?Well, it’s been a long time since I posted any favorite spam. It’s not as amusing these days, as the bots have gotten more sophisticated. No longer are there long strings of keywords that formed a strange kind of unintentional spam poetry.

No, these spam comments today could potentially fool the naive, potentially, with their seeming sincerity. This recent one caught my eye, though — the only reason being that it fooled (the rarely fooled) Akismet filter as being legitimate and was placed in the pending review queue. It’s bollocks, of course, so never mind that.

But it did amuse me. Of course my posts are nothing but fastidious. To wit:

sell rs gold
arm2game.dessky.net/2013/04/19/a-lot-of-my-guild-… x
Submitted on 2013/04/22 at 8:25 am

Very quickly this web site will be famous amid all blogging users, due to it’s fastidious posts

Actually, I Couldn’t Healthcare Less about Spam

The “fastidious” clearly indicates the use of Google Translate; clearly this the work of an MMO gold farmer. One would assume from somewhere in Asia, but who is to say? Clearly likely, though, from someplace where English is not the first language. Here’s an example from the actual linked page:

We’re so near to getting Evening Vanquisher cheap rs gold, I can almost flavor it. A lot of my guild partners would really like to have the name, and I’m sure when we down Sartharion with three drakes this weeks time — fingertips surpassed… — a lot of them will be wearing it in Dalaran. I’m not too interested in it myself. I couldn’t actually health care less. It’s awesome and all, but what I really want is Battlemaster.

Of course this is probably what my French sounds like to a native French speaker much of the time; certainly that’s what my limited Thai sounds like. But then my Thai friends can usually get the flavor of it. Eventually my fingertips will surpass it, but then they could healthcare less.

And who hangs out in Dalaran anymore?

You fail @ teh Intertubes

Attention [tag]marketers[/tag]. Yeah, okay, you discovered [tag]blogs[/tag], and [tag]viral marketing[/tag] and whatnot. Congratulations. Unfortunately for you, your kung fu is week. I am immune to your jedi mind tricks, and other such pop-culture metaphors. Akismet always catches your faux comments on my blog, and surely many, many others. And even if it didn’t … do you really thing I’m going to believe that some clown who supposedly maintains the blog at estateplanning.com or realestateadvisor.com really thinks my blog writing is great? Especially with the stuff I’ve been venting about lately?

C’mon … srsly. Epic fail. Weaksauce, even.